I often find that there are many “convenient” phrases that people like to use when they don’t know what to say…

It’s God’s plan

Everything comes full circle.

Everything happens for a reason…

Now, I do have to admit that, the everything happens for a reason one, I use a lot.  I HATE when people use it when someone dies.  It’s such bullshit.  But, for events that happen in one’s life, I do believe to be true… and today, life taught me how right it is..

I was supposed to take my old lady bus trip to NYC with a friend of mine today.  Super excited to go, spend some great girl time with my friend, see some great sights and hunt for knock off Louis Vuitton purse (am totally guilty of this).  Well, last night, my friend texted me alerting me to the fact that NYC was suppose to get 6 inches of snow and be bitter cold today.  Ummmm, if I was in a cozy Broadway theater, maybe, but sight seeing and tracking down my replicas (sounds better than cheap imitations) would not be fun if I was going to become a snowbeast.  Trip cancelled.  Or, postponed.  Those Louis bags won’t be safe for very long.

Anyway, so, here I be… my son has guitar lessons on Saturday.  I honestly dread the drive, but, I drive alllll week, so what’s another 30 minutes in the car.  Normally, his lessons are at noon, but, for some odd reason, they were at 3:30 today.  Initially, I thought they were at 3, so I kept yapping at him and he corrected me (that -never-happens…).  We left at a decent time (see above about never happening) and after a coffee stop (shout out to Dunkin), we were on our way.  Then, of course my gas light starts flashing.  Alex: “Mom, we stopped for coffee, we cannot stop for gas..”  Me: “Ok, Alex, whatever you say” (knowing that I didn’t want to get out in the cold (he had all the cold weather gear on and I hate all that stuff so I wore a sweater as it was freezing and snowing).  We get off on the required exit and as I am pulling off, I remembered there was a gas station right there.  SCORE!  I pull in and hand him the card to pump gas and begrudgingly, he gets out to do it.  Mother of the year here, folks.  Anyway, just as he is getting out, I hear this car horn beeping non stop.  I see the man pumping gas in front of us kind of do that from side to side open mouth head turn that one does when something unbelievable just happened.  I hear Alex go “MOM”.  Hello Mom instincts on high. As I jumped out of my car, I saw an SUV pull into the gas station.  Front end completely destroyed.  A woman hops out of the driver’s seat – sobbing and yelling about her daughter.  I tossed Alex my phone and ran over to see what was going on.  Out of the car right now is stumbling a teenager… blood streaming down her face.  She is confused and not talking.  Add now nursing instincts kicking into high gear – she’s bleeding from the head, she must have hit her head.. concussion… she is disoriented.. concussion.. she might have hit her neck.. neck injury.. she’s got a massive deep gash on her forehead and the blood is streaming down her face kind of like a fresh stream in the springtime.  Guiding her over to the back bumper, I yelled for Alex to bring me supplies from the back of my trunk.  Being a hospice nurse, my trunk is full of things that I just might need when I make a visit.  I am yelling for things that he should bring me and he is just as calm and collected as he can be bringing them over.  At this point, other people have started to come over.  I started motioning to the one lady that I have the girl and she should go after the mom, who is walking around crying hysterically.  None of the airbags went off, so I was thinking the mom might be hurt, too, even though I saw no evidence of blood.  It’s funny how a whole group of strangers banded together to help this mother and daughter out.  Someone brought a blanket, another person brought bags to help clean up the garbage from the mess I was making with supplies to help the girl and another person was trying to calm the justifiably hysterical mom.  No one knew anyone else.  We all however, knew what we needed to do.  Long of the short is that mom and daughter were just running errands when mom lost control on an ice patch and hit a utility pole at about 60 miles an hour.  She is very lucky that the daughter only had that laceration on her head.  As I am sopping up her blood with gauze, someone yelled at me about gloves.  Sorry, but, that was the last thing on my mind.  A girl was bleeding and in distress, I am not going to stop and put on gloves.  Anyway, the ambulance finally came.  Both mom and daughter were taken to the hospital.  I’ve been thinking about them non stop.  As I was cleaning up the young girl, she mouthed out thank you….

I wasn’t supposed to even be in my state today.  I wasn’t supposed to take my son to his lessons.  I shouldn’t have let my gas tank run so low that the light went off (I know.. I Russian Roulette it pretty often).  How is it that a nurse with ICU experience and a trunk full of supplies is right there when an accident happens?  I could have had my old job where I didn’t have a trunk full of supplies.  Someone put me on a path different than the one I thought I was going to take today.  Everything happens for a reason…..

By Helen Haddick BSN RN CHPN

RN who has just left critical care in the hospital for hospice. Join me for my journey Please feel free to leave comments and like if you enjoy this

1 comment

  1. Wow, thanks for sharing your amazing story. For many years I believed that everything happens for a reason. Now, I believe that God uses all things, good and bad, for our good. He is always working behind the scenes to create beauty out of ashes…and we are all interconnected with each other.


Leave a comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: